I often encounter moms who admire what I do.
And I don’t blame them. I have the best career ever.
And it’s only taken me fourteen years to get here. 🙂
But what may not be immediately apparent to moms who want to work at home is that I did not get to where I am today by coveting what others had.
Okay, maybe I started that way. Maybe we all start that way.
But we should not act from envy. We should simply acknowledge that if we experience envy, then maybe we are not taking ourselves as seriously as we should.
Envy is not a signal that is telling you to copy or imitate what someone else is doing. It’s an inner voice that is shouting to be heard.
So let your envy help you turn inward and listen more closely as you build your skills that help you take yourself more seriously.
As for me, years ago before I was known, I would read freelance books by successful freelancers such as Linda Formichelli, Diana Burrell, and Kelly James Enger and then I would feel disappointed with myself.
These women seemed so much more driven than I was. They seemed to operate at a pace I would never be capable of achieving, never mind emulating.
Initially I erroneously believed that there was only one way to achieve success and that they all knew what it was and that I would never be able to compete.
And I was right. Because it wasn’t until I stopped trying to compete and imitate and emulate that I began to become more genuinely successful.
Once I stopped imagining that others had everything all figured out and embraced what I could learn and express for myself, then I started to experience my own momentum.
And once I started to experience my own momentum, then I started to become unstoppable and irrepressible…just like them. But also nothing like them and completely like me.
So in the long run, my career trajectory doesn’t look like those of the folks I initially looked up to, and if you look up to me, then maybe this is important for you to hear.
And when I look at my most prolific and profitable students, I can see that I have been successful in teaching them how to be themselves, not to imitate me. The more they are like them and not like me, the more successful they are.
I am here to teach writers to challenge themselves so they can learn new career skills and grow. I am not here to create a bunch of mini-me groupies. And I am most proud of my students when their work is a natural expression of everything they are.
So don’t go become a groupie, because we are all here to be ourselves in the world, not an imitation of someone else. The day you feel like an equal with the people you formerly placed on a pedestal is a day to celebrate.
We are all just people and success is equally available to all. Just make sure you are seeking your success and don’t try to take a ride on someone else’s bandwagon.
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Thank you for sharing that you once felt disappointed with yourself after reading about others. I am moving past that a bit, likely from your coaching 🙂 I used to bemoan that I started so late but now I try to focus on how far I have come and celebrate that I am writing and finding out how to do that as me. I am also open to see how that will morph and grow.
You are doing an amazing job being you, Sue, and you’ve got the clips to show for it! I love the way you show up in all of your writing. And I also love how you have the wisdom to bring real writing skills into your work to carry it out in the most professional manner possible. Seems to me, and based on your considerable progress in such a short time, that you started at the exact right time. 🙂
Thanks. Accepting that I am where I am meant to be is definitely part of my journey.