Mark Your Calendar for a Writer Mama/Author Mama Proudest Moments Celebration: Friday, May 14, 2010

I have decided that we need a party around here.

First of all, some writer mamas I know are really struggling. They are contending with moves, job losses (either their job or their significant other’s job), sending husbands overseas to war, the blues, a lack of detachment or confidence, not feeling good about their own progress, and the big ones, loss of a loved one and divorce.

On the other hand, I am privy to so much success! Some of my most recent students are getting published for the first time ever. Some of them are turning that into multiple publications in a row. Some of my older students are rethinking their approaches and, you guessed it, getting published. A few of my students have books coming out this year.

And here’s something that ought to inspire you: sometimes those who are hitting the mark in their writing career are doing so after bouncing back from a major loss. So take that and put it in your pipe and smoke it, you stupid recession.

On the platform-development front, those who are doing best are, you guessed it, the slow and steady builders. They are doing amazing things like getting quoted in magazine articles, launching classes, securing sponsors, finishing manuscripts that were languishing, and just otherwise keeping their eyes on the prize, whatever the prize may be for them.

In case, I don’t sound proud, let me say that I am very pleased. 🙂

But the person I am most proud of is…myself.

A year ago I was buried in overcommitment. I was a prisoner of my own enthusiasm. I said yes to too many people too often and was trying to carry everyone to the next level with me (which by the way, if you are trying to do it, doesn’t work).

I made some tough decisions last spring. Not the least of which was to cease publication of an e-zine I’d nurtured for six years, Writers on the Rise, at the end of 2009. But I was serious about not over-committing so that I could set a better example of how to be an empowered writer. I knew it would take time and be a gradual shift. And it took an entire year. In fact, one year ago, I felt like I was setting a BAD example. An example that really could not and should not be duplicated.

My poor example wasn’t based on anything I’d written in my books. In fact, if I could have simply followed my own advice, I would have been doing a heck of a lot better than I was. I wasn’t focusing on my own process. I was being pulled into the needs of others all the time. Too much. In fact, if I’m really being honest, I spent a lot of last year exhausted, crabby, and in pain due to  a work-exacerbated injury.

Sure, there were a few bright spots. I tried to focus on them to keep myself going, but really I’d hurt myself by caring more for others than I did for myself.

But you know what? I am not setting that poor example any longer. It took a whole year. A year of letting commitments run their course, of riding out responsibilities because that was the right thing to do. A year of getting ready to say no because that’s what grown ups say when they need to do their job.

And today, I’m proud of myself. I’m proud of myself because I’ve organized a work life I can live with that does not dominate every single minute of every single day. I am more clear about what I do and who I work with and how. I can work when I’m working and not work when I’m not working. Most importantly to my career, I can enjoy my work again. And I am.

I’m still busy, of course. Hello, it’s me, Christina. What would you expect?

But I’m enjoying time with my husband and daughter more. We’ve moved into a home we love.  I am enjoying a lot of success in my career without feeling like I have to compromise my own needs to have it or keep it.

And now, when I partner with others, I feel better about it, because I’m coming from a place of feeling full, not depleted. In fact, I feel like I am having a creative renaissance. I haven’t felt this inspired in years and it’s coming through in my work and in my everyday life. As an extra bonus, I am experiencing a ton of joy in just living.  I wish I could wrap that up and give it to each one of you but, of course, I can’t.

But I would love it if joy was also your goal. You might get there, as I did, by going through the side-door of imbalance. And that’s okay. This is what humans do to work things out.

And now here is where the party comes in…

I never had a party for Writer Mama. I never had a party for Get Known. Truth be told, I’m not much of a real-life hostess (even though I can pull together one heck of an author series). So let’s have a virtual party for my first e-book, Author Mama because THIS I know how to do.

I’d like to invite writer mamas and author mamas to celebrate with me, not just the e-book, but what it represents – accomplishing work that feels important to share. And I hope this will remind you that the best way to help others rise to the occasion in their careers is not by carrying them but by inspiring them (and sure, yes, okay, an occasional kick in the butt or deadline doesn’t hurt me or my students).

But for this celebration, I’d like us each to find our own motivation, by digging deep, and sharing our proudest writing career moments. It doesn’t matter if it was your first real publication or your decision to not work because your child needed you or whatever. It’s yours to choose. So you decide. Don’t try to make it monumental, just try to make it true.

And then, from your submissions, I’ll compile a post called: The Proudest Career Moments of Writer Mamas/Author Mamas 2010. I think we will all get a lot out of this. I know I will.

Your Assignment, Should You Choose To Accept It: Submit the proudest moment of your writing career thus far to me by April 30, 2010. I will then compile them and post them on the party date, which is Friday, May 14, 2010. Keep it 200-400 words, single-spaced, put it in a Microsoft Word document, and e-mail it to my new e-mail address (“katzchristina at comcast dot net”), which you should add to your address book, by the way, if you haven’t already.

If you have questions, put them in the comments. But please save your proudest moments for party day. Thanks!

And by the way, THIS is my proudest moment. I’m not perfect. Nothing is. But I’m proud of myself. And that’s what we’re talking about.

Photo by hocusfocusclick